Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Dieting tips for the new age

Most people keep cribbing about how they need to lose weight. This is a common refrain especially among the female of the species. During one such refraining session, a colleague said, "You know what, instead of striving to eat lesser, all that a person needs to do to achieve optimal weight is to grow taller till they are proportional for their weight."

Aha. Now there's a thought. I have never consciously tried to grow taller and all the height I have so far came by on its own without me staying away from as much as a celery stick. In fact I distinctly remember that eating well contributed to my height.

Based on this evidence, growing taller seems to be a more hassle free and enjoyable alternative to eating lesser. Of course, there is the caveat that sometimes, before reaching optimal weight, a person might need to extend vertically till his/her head is sticking somewhere into the ionosphere. But hey, tall is good (for reference, look at the heights of super models).

So I am all set. From now on, off with watching what I eat and other old-fashioned ideas. Only growing taller for me.

Now, if someone can tell me how I can communicate to my body that it is supposed to grow vertically and not horizontally whenever I eat.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Annoy-o-meter

Regular readers of this blog will be aware of the special relationship I share with Aishwarya Rai. Namely, I can't stand her acting. I find her plasticky, annoying and the target of my prayers for being an early victim in any movie having any chance, however minuscule, of killings.

Given that Ash usually just has to make a physical presence in a movie to make her annoying, in Dhoom 2, she managed to take her "my-annoying-self" performance to sterling levels. Five minutes into her appearance, I was wanting to throw something at the screen. Ten minutes later, I was pulling my hair out in frustration. Fifteen minutes later, I hoped Hrithik or Abhishek or even random character on the road #3 would have the good sense to bump her off.

Of course no such thing happened. At the end of the movie, finding myself still sane, I felt like a survivor. I found a new appreciation for the tolerance levels of the entire crew of Dhoom-2. And though I woke up at night in cold sweat with echoes of "Funny guy" and "Sunehri like likes you" in my head for quite a few days afterwards, the frequency of these incidents gradually decreased.

The point I am trying to make is, after watching Ash in Dhoom-2 I thought the absolute zenith of an annoying performance in cinema had been reached. No matter how annoying any other actor was in any movie, beside Ash's spectacular Dhoom-2 performance, they were mere fireflies beside the sun. That Dhoom-2 performance would forever occupy the numero uno position in my Annoying Performances Hall of Fame.

Or so I thought. Then I watched Asin in Dasavatharam. Till she opened her mouth to talk, she looked very pretty. The words "En perumal-a kudu" were the harbinger of doom. High pitched, irritating, murder-inducing, annoying - Asin managed it all and more!

Why on earth could not the character Fletcher who seemed to kill everyone else at first glance not have killed Asin on a priority basis? I think it was his devious plan to try to drive Govindraj to suicide due to unbearable torture by giving him Asin's constant company. Seeing the sheer number of places where Asin could have been bumped off convincingly and yet was still left alive was like being denied candy after being taken all the way to the checkout counter again and again.

By the time the end of the movie rolled around, I was eagerly awaiting it. There did not seem to be any other way out of watching the torture called Asin.

To be fair to Asin, unlike Ash's role in Dhoom-2 which *might* have been saved by a better actress, *anyone* performing Asin's role in Dasavatharam would have been equally horribly annoying. Which is why I have decided to let Ash retain her title of most annoying performer ever. But let me tell you, it is a very very narrow victory.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

SATC Quiz

Rads posted her result on this "Which Sex and the City character are you" quiz on her blog and asked her female readers (why not the male ones too, you know, to explore their inner woman and such :-D?) to try it out for a lark.

As someone who watched the entire Sex and the City series on DVD over a span of 3 weeks (in case you are wondering, yeah, yeah, I was working full time too), how could I resist.

I finished the quiz and while the score was getting calculated I thought, "Please, let me be anybody but a Charlotte!" I find Charlotte a bit too wimpy for my tastes.

Then I thought, "Ah, it will be fun if I am a Miranda" - though I did not agree completely with this quiz's take on Miranda's character. Any time someone asks me which character in SATC I resemble the most, I promptly say Miranda, though Carrie is the writer (I write blogs, got it?).

Samantha is someone I cannot identify with at all. Brazen me is an oxymoron (unless my rather gullible personality gets coaxed into being brazen - my dear friends will know what I am talking about).

Finally these are my scores below. Kinda funny no, the 40, 30, 20 and 10 :-D? And oh, readers (both female and male) of this blog, do take up the quiz. It is short and fun. If you have a blog too, pliss to post your results :-)!

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Sex and the City: The Four Women, the Four Elements
Your results are based on the four Elements of Astrology: Fire, Earth, Air and Water. Each Element has its own set of characteristics, and each of us displays some combination thereof, usually with a focus on one or two. Samantha, Miranda, Carrie and Charlotte each personify one of the Elements and its basic traits. Which Elements most strongly influence you?

Note: Scores are rounded to one decimal place and therefore may not total 100%

You scored 40% Carrie
Your answers peg you as a Carrie-type, much influenced by the Air Sign qualities associated with Gemini, Libra and Aquarius. Like confident Carrie, a sex columnist, you're curious and perceptive, always seeking answers and never satisfied with the superficial. An Air Sign influence can lead to indecision and an avoidance of tough issues, like with Carrie and her on-again, off-again attachment to Mr. Big. Forward-thinking, incredibly intelligent and witty, you just exude quirky charm. You'd be utterly bored by someone who's just a pretty face or hot body -- though you don't mind looking and flirting! You're more turned on by an equally smart and funny mate, someone who challenges your mind and makes you laugh. You love to talk, so you need a good listener who's open to playful and eccentric ideas about love and lovemaking.

You scored 30% Charlotte
A romantic at heart, you chose the answers that demure Charlotte may have chosen. Strongly influenced by the intuitive, profound and sometimes naïve Water Signs -- Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces -- you're like a mother, a mystery and a poet all in one. Though on the surface you may seem innocent and all about seeking the good in people, beneath the surface, you hide secret yearnings for intimacy, for attachment and ideal love. You're seeking a knight in shining armor, a soul mate, someone who will complete you and tether you to the earth when you get carried away with your fantasies. You're super-sensitive, soaking up the moods of others; you emote freely, crying at commercials and sappy movies. You also provide a shoulder to cry on and open arms for hugs. Be careful that you're not so wide-eyed and trusting that you get taken in by some cunning wolf in sheep's clothing.

You scored 20% Miranda
You chose many of the same answers that Earth Sign-like Miranda, the cynical but pragmatic lawyer, might have chosen. Just like Miranda's had a tough time deciding whether to give in to the affections of Steve the Bartender, you don't give your heart up to just anyone. Miranda shies away from a relationship with Steve because he's 'just' a bartender, not something more conventionally ambitious or stable. Those with powerful Earth Sign qualities -- characteristics associated with Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn -- are cautious in love and seek stability and status over nearly anything else. Earth Signs provide a steady, realistic attitude and they can bring order out of chaos. A little-known Earth Sign fact: Incredibly sensual, you seethe beneath that smart, expensive business suit of yours, yearning for intimacy but hesitant to give up your material needs, your career ambitions or your responsibilities for a passionate moment that might not turn out the way you'd hope.

You scored 10% Samantha
You identify with Samantha's bold and liberated Fire Sign qualities, characteristics associated with the Signs of Aries, Leo and Sagittarius. You're strong, audacious and larger than life -- and you take what you want! Sometimes you can even be thoughtless and selfish, as you get so caught up in craving immediate gratification and excitement that you overlook someone's feelings. Your personal style likely reflects your desires: sleek, low-cut, revealing just a bit more than might be considered acceptable. Watch that you're not coming on too strong, though. You could scare potential suitors off with all your drama. If you seek so much attention, the more basic qualities of the Fire Signs could be burned right out of the picture. Show less skin or cleavage and more of your creativity, your vibrant leadership skills and courageous generosity!

Monday, June 09, 2008

Something smells gooood


Yesterday, I visited the mall after a long time. I found that my favorite splurging store, Bath and Body Works, was having a summer clearance sale. My eyes had hardly registered the word "sale" when I found myself standing plumb in the middle of the store.

I picked up a very promising looking bottle of body lotion made by the Bigelow company. That company makes a mean lip balm, I tell ya. The body lotion ought to be good too, I decided. Besides, the bottle said the lotion had the natural fragrance of almonds. Best of all, it was 75% off - woo hoo!

Late last night, before going to bed, I eagerly tried on my new lotion. It smelled divine alright. Of freshly baked almond biscotti. Suddenly I found myself very very hungry. And I stared longingly at my lotioned arm.

I forced myself to not taste some of that yummy smelling lotion and instead snacked on some unhealthy stuff. Finally I went off to sleep, dreaming of cookies and cake. As if I am not already surrounded by enough food temptations. Bah!

But frankly, that wonderful smell is totally worth it!

p.s. The lotion itself is light and smooth. Very nice

p.s.1 My dad expressed relief that I had not bought the lotion before the Yosemite trip. He said that he had no doubt that some of the bears would have taken up residence in our cottage there then!

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

All that jazz

A couple of months ago, I decided I needed a break from my routine weekly fitness classes. I scoured the ever dependable community center's activities guide for a class different from my usual ones. And there it was - "Broadway Jazz". Get fit in a fun way, it urged. Tada!

I signed up with great enthusiasm - a fitness class incorporating dance moves should be fun! On D-day, I landed up in class in my track-pants and tennis shoes, towel and water-bottle in hand. Once inside the class, something struck me as being different about me.

It soon became obvious. Of the total of nine participants, I was the only one wearing tennis shoes. Everyone else was wearing dance shoes. Huh!?! Wasn't this a fitness class?

Soon after I made this observation, the instructor turned on some music and did a whole series of ballet-like moves rapidly one after the other. Then she stopped, turned around and told us to do all of these moves as a warm up exercise. Everyone else plunged into doing the moves. I picked my fallen jaw off the floor, gaped some more and hurried to copy everyone else's moves.

That was when it struck me - I had managed to join a dance class incorporating, duh, dance moves. Oh no. I mean, I have been to salsa classes before, but there at least I knew I was going to dance. Besides, was jazz even a kind of dance?

And then, to rub salt onto my stupid presumptions, I discovered that every other participant in the class except yours truly had been at least to one dance class under the same teacher before. Oh dear.

The rest of the warm-up session reminded me of comedians from various movies. You know, where everyone is doing something and the comedian alone is doing a whole different thing? Where the comedian then rushes to catch up and invariably winds up bungling?

Yeah - I was that comedian. Everyone else would have already pirouetted half way across the room by the time I realized what the move was. I would rush to catch up. And then when everyone had finished the move and were facing the front of the class, I would be the odd woman still in the middle of the move facing the back of the class. Normally, I would have fervently prayed for the ground to swallow me up at that point. But for some reason, that particular day, I just found it all very funny and simply grinned.

The warm-up concluded with abs-crunches (ha, finally something I am damn good at) and other floor exercises - all familiar territory, restoring my confidence a bit. The teacher then told us that we would be dancing for "All that Jazz" from the Broadway musical Chicago.

She went over the steps slowly - we tried to follow her. Though I caught on to some of the steps, I was still floundering. She then said she would turn on the music so we could all dance to it. Right - even with no music I danced more or less like a particularly drunk crab with arms!

She turned on the music. And a strange thing happened. After ages of looking and acting like a person grinning in spite of a stomach ache, I started enjoying myself. It was just so much fun to dance to the music - the moves just seemed to fit seamlessly with the music. And who cared if I sometimes tapped my left foot first instead of my right and vice versa - it was still so much fun!

The rest of the class went off in a flurry of dancing like a star (yup, turns out that dances in musicals most often are Jazz dances).

That's how at the end of the class, much to my own surprise, I decided to stick with it for the entire duration*. My instructor was a sweet lady who said that if I came a bit earlier to class, she would go over steps with me beforehand. This helped quite a bit with complicated steps.

At the end of two months, I had learnt quite a bit about ball changes, pirouettes, jazz walks and touch steps. More than that, I had learnt how it is possible to have fun even while doing something you so superbly suck at :-)!

* I guess I was not the only one surprised at my decision to stick with the class. At the end of the 8-week session, my teacher hugged me and said she was so glad that I had decided to stick it with. It is an entirely different matter that she looked like she was going to get a heart attack when I told her that I might continue classes with her for the next session ;-)**.

**I have not yet done that.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Beautiful Yosemite

This past weekend, we graced Yosemite with our presence. This time, it was not to attempt feats of valor like last year. Instead we did proper touristy stuff like relaxing, sightseeing and taking tons of pictures.

Even the almost incessant drizzle and generally cloudy and cold weather could not quite mask the ethereal beauty of Yosemite. No wonder the national park boasts of some of the most photographed vistas in the world. My camera does not do much justice, still...

One of the views from the famous Tunnel View point



The same view later in the day when the fog and mist had rolled in



The Bridal Veil falls - isn't the scene breathtaking? Trivia: legend goes that if you stare at the Bridal Veil falls for an entire minute without blinking, you will get married within a year (don't know if you will get divorced if you are already married :-P)!



Tipis at the Native Indian museum in the Yosemite visitor center. They look so cute - wonder whether they are as cute to actually live in!



The mandatory sunlight* filtering through trees (albeit giant sequoia trees) snap.
*ok ok - it is hazy alright



The "clothes pin" giant sequoia tree. Apparently a natural forest fire burnt a hole through the trunk. Yup, the resilient tree is still thriving and going strong. And oh, believe it or not, the hole is wide enough for a pick-up truck to drive through!



Snow in Upper Mariposa Grove - it had snowed the previous day there! Needless to say, the trip to Mariposa Grove consisted of a lot of stamping about and shivering in addition to sightseeing!



The venerable Grizzly Giant sequoia tree. This grand dame is a royal 2700 years old!


Bottom line: Yosemite definitely ought to be on your list of must-visit places!

Monday, May 19, 2008

Kada kutty*

It is always said that parents never stop being parents. In other words, to parents, their kids are forever trapped in a drooling, squiggle-eyed, gurgling baby time-warp.

I was talking with a friend the other day and she told me that her father had called her up early in the morning that day. It had turned unseasonably cold the previous night and he wanted to remind her to put on her sweater when she left for work. Did I mention? My friend turned 50 just recently.

Though I had heard about this compulsive-parenting phenomenon much earlier, my firsthand experience came about when I was in tenth grade.

Mom, dad and me had gone to visit some temple in South India. When we reached the temple entrance, dad was walking a little ahead while mom and me were lagging behind, admiring the architecture.

As we crossed the threshold of the temple, mom excitedly grabbed my hand and said, "Ooooh Archu! Look, what a huge elephant!" as she pointed out to the token elephant standing at the entrance. "So big, no? How exciting for you!" she continued.

At that point I gave a cold glare and crossly said, "Mummeeeeeee! I am not in kindergarden you know. I know what an elephant looks like. You don't have to point it out to me. I have seen plenty of elephants before in my life!" and stomped off angrily to complain to dad.

I caught up with dad and was just about to start complaining when he excitedly interrupted me, "Oh, here you are. I was looking for you! I wanted to show you the elephant. Did you see it? So big, no?"

Aaaaargh! I am sure the other people in the temple must have thought I was a mentally retarded 14 year old. Unless they were also parents, in which case they must have been too busy pointing out the elephant to their offspring to notice.

Oh well! As I said, parents will be parents!
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*kada kutty refers to the last born in a house. Kada kuttys usually get even more babying than their siblings.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The non-hanging garden of my patio.

Swish, swish. There, I just brushed off the last of the dust from the cave I had crawled into for the past few weeks. I have been super-duper busy. Before you roll eyes and go, "Yeah, right", for a change, this is not the usual self-important sounding excuse. I was actually busy. To all the readers (actually make that reader, singular) who worried about me: I am doing fine :-)! Things are now almost back to normal and I am all set to be a glittering part of your lives again. Woohoo or groan, whichever!
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'Tis the season to garden. This year I have gotten super ambitious. Yesterday's trip to OSH saw me return with a tomato plant, a yolo pepper plant, mint plants, two different varieties of flowering plants and a big bag of Supersoil. It was only while I was planting that I realized that I did not have enough soil for all the plants. Also, I had two empty pots left even after all the plants had found a home. Some googling also informed me that the pot in which I planted the pepper was too small for it. So much for claiming to be a seasoned gardener.

This morning I remedied the situation by repairing back to OSH and buying additional soil, a bigger pot and some more flowering plants for the empty pots. This is how my patio looks currently.


I solicit all unoccupied fingers you may have to cross them on my garden's behalf and wish for the healthy growth of my plants. Thank you!

Yesterday was also the day when, after a long period of not seeing any water except for the excess water draining from the plant pots, the patio was washed and cleaned. My poor back stands (or rather curves) testimony to that. Groan.

Oh well, anything for my garden.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Tag time

Joy has tagged me. Since she explicitly expressed belief that I would be a prompt and responsible tag-doer, I am doing it now (okay, Vishesh and Binaryfootprints, please to not burn hole on computer monitor - I have not forgotten your tags yet, I swear).

BTW, is it just me or does everyone think that everyone in the blog world seems to be doing this tag? Anyways, on to the question and answer session.

Last Movie You Saw In A Theater:
U, me aur Hum. As I already said, ugh.

What Book Are You Reading:
Very Good Jeeves, for the n+1th time. Ideally, with my current Jane Austen obsession, it should have been Northanger Abbey. But current status of affairs does not permit me to indulge myself in reading to the exclusion of everything else. And Northanger Abbey would have been too much temptation...

Favorite Board Game:
Cluedo. For some reason, I was quite good at this and always managed to detect the murderer before anyone else everytime we played. Scrabble is a close second (I am not that great there though).

Favorite Magazine:
Reader's Digest, though these days it is more a comfort magazine (like comfort food). I like reading Time.

Favorite Smells:
Love the smell of rain on dusty ground, the smell of fresh ground coffee, the smell of mom's cooking as I enter the house.

Favorite Sound:
Sound of waves crashing on the seashore.

Worst Feeling In The World:
Self-loathing, helplessness

What Is The First Thing You Think Of When You Wake? :
Mostly it is: do I really have to wake up right now?

Favorite Fast Food Place:
No place in particular.

Future Child's Name:
Archana 2.0 (if it is a girl) and Archie 2.0 (if it is a boy)

Finish This Statement. "If I Had A Lot Of Money I'd...”:
...travel, travel, travel.

Do You Drive Fast? :
Not on local roads. On freeways I usually find myself doing around 10mph above speed limit.

Do You Sleep With A Stuffed Animal?:
Yup - have a collection both on bed and bedside table.

Storms-Cool Or Scary? :
Cool.

What Was Your First Car?:
Is a Honda Civic.

Favourite drink:
Hot masala chai.

Finish This Statement, "If I Had The Time I Would .....” :
...do even more of nothing.

Do You Eat The Stems On Broccoli?:
Yup. Love broccoli either raw or lightly cooked.

If You Could Dye Your Hair Any Color, What Would Be Your Choice? :
Coppery-brown. Yeah, I tried this shade once on my hair. Only time you could actually spot it was if you looked really hard when I stood under direct sunlight or a bright yellow lamp.

Name All The Different Cities/Towns You Have Lived In
Pune, Thanjavur, Chennai, Calcutta, Karur, Madurai, Mumbai, Davis and now Bay Area.

Favorite Sports To Watch:
Used to watch cricket a lot. This later dwindled to watching World Cup cricket matches when India played. Now nothing. I love watching events like figure-skating, diving, gymnastics etc... though I start getting bored around the time contestant #3 makes an appearance.

One Nice Thing About The Person Who Sent This To You:
Have never met Joy but I feel like I know her well. We seem to think similarly about many things. Would absolutely love to meet up with you someday (coming to the Bay, anytime :-)?)

What's Under Your Bed?:
A box full of CDs and a disassembled shelf.

Would You Like To Be Born As Yourself Again?
Definitely. Good or bad, I like me!

Morning Person Or Night Owl?:
Night owl to the core. I have no difficulty seeing 6am by keeping awake through the night. Waking up at 6am though usually qualifies for a spot in the "tough things I have done in my life" list.

Over Easy Or Sunny Side Up?:
Sunny side up with lots of fresh ground pepper. Eat with toast. Yumm! (screw salmonella).

Favorite Place To Relax:
By the beach with a book, listening to the waves.

Favorite Pie:
Chocolate cream pie.

Favorite Ice Cream Flavor:
Not much of an ice cream person. But will not say no to Baskin Robbin's Pralines 'n Cream ice cream. And oh, the fudge topping from Ghirardelli - yum, yum, yum!

Of All The People You Tagged This To, Who's Most Likely To Respond First?
Hopefully, Shilpa.

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Tag award ceremony:
Shilpa (keep up my trust, no?) and Pratap (pliss to do at least this one!).

That's all folks!

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Reader's Digest

My earliest memories of Reader's Digest date back to the time I was in kindergarten. Contrary to what you may have concluded, I was not a child prodigy, able to read the magazine from cover to cover at the ripe old age of 3. Rather, I used to find in the magazine's pages, a pretty convenient place to write "check" marks with a red pen, finally giving "scores" at the end of each article with flourish, just like Sandhya miss in my LKG class did in my notebooks. Of course, as soon my parents discovered this new hobby, it died a premature death.

Reader's Digest(RD) has been a part of my household for as long as I remember. Dad started subscribing to it from the time he started working, much to my mom's delight. It meant that she would not have to give up reading RD (which my grandfather used to subscribe to) after marriage. Little wonder then, when sis and me came into existence, this family interest got passed on to us too.

Starting around age 7, I was able to read the simpler page fillers and the simpler jokes in the various features like "Life is like that", "Laughter the best medicine" and so on. As I grew older, I started reading pretty much the entire magazine. I also had fun reading interesting old RD article collections (which mom had patiently clipped out and bound) as well as the collections published by RD itself (I still have fond memories of a book of short stories which had stories like "Lamb to the slaughter", "The selfish giant" and "The wedding gift").

Irrespective of the number of transfers my dad went through, RD subscriptions always followed. When a new issue of RD arrived, there would be a tussle as to who would read it first. Mom was soon relegated to late mornings and noon as the only time when she could get her hands on it (when the rest of us were at work/school). Sis and me would fight over it when we got back from school - soon, a reading schedule was brought into existence to restore peace in the household. Dad of course, could choose anytime he wanted (ah, the perks of being head of household :-)).

During exam time, while cable TV connection got disconnected at friends' and cousins' houses, it stayed untouched in my house. Instead, mom would hide new issues of RD! Of course, we subscribed to other magazines too but somehow RD had a special pride of place.

To my dismay, around the time I was finishing my undergraduate education, I started noticing a deterioration in the quality of the RD articles. But hey, it was by no means poor quality and besides, it was still The Reader's Digest!

Once I got to the US, RD was sporadically subscribed to by roomies. But it was no longer a constant, unchanging part of my life. Then, a couple of years ago, my manager gifted me a with subscription to RD. Yippee!

I started receiving RD regularly and continued subscribing to it. Good or bad, RD was a source of comfort, a sign of being at "home" - home being defined by as a place always having the latest issue of RD. Of course, I enjoyed reading it too. And so it has been since then.

Last week, I got into a fever of house-cleaning. I found that, true to my hoarding tendencies, I had stored *every* issue of RD I had ever got from the time I started subscription. In a way, I guess this was a legacy from my childhood days when RD magazines alone were not thrown away easily (you really did not think that I would miss an opportunity to squarely place the hoarding blame elsewhere, did you).

Anyway, hardening my heart, I gathered them all into a big plastic bag, to be taken to the dumpster. Then, I felt bad. Nice magazines - why throw them away? Maybe I could donate them to someone who wanted them. The local library seemed like a bad option. Google to the rescue! I discovered that apparently there were places to give away stuff. Then it struck me, Craigslist!

Late on Friday night, I placed an ad on Craigslist - "Free old issues of Reader's Digest magazine", it proclaimed - with little hope of response. My main aim was to assuage my guilty conscience by proving to myself that I had tried *not* throwing those magazines away.

To my pleasant surprise, within the next 10 minutes, I had a response from a lady saying that she wanted to pick them up the very next day. Before morning came, I had two more positive responses. The next day noon, the lady stopped by my house and picked up the RDs. Resolutely shaking off my last bit of possessiveness I handed over the bag of old RDs to her, just managing to not add in a choked voice, "Please take good care of them".

Vive la Reader's Digest!